Monday, September 25, 2017

Top Ten Upsides of a Nuclear War with North Korea

Mark Graber

1.      Gives Donald Trump new opportunities to demonstrate incompetent, boorish and bigoted behaviors.
2.      Nuclear winter will reverse the consequences of climate change.
3.      Will likely increase federal health care spending.
4.      Americans will all be singing Tom Lehrer’s, “So Long Mom, I’m off to Drop the Bomb”
5.      Will enable Puerto Ricans to take their minds off having no food, power or safe water.
6.      Rubble will provide cheaper material for building the Wall.
7.      Domestic hate groups will expand their repertoire.
8.      Congress, taking a cue from World War I, will insist that kimchee be referred to as “liberty cabbage.”
9.      Students kneeling under their desks when national anthem is played during air raids will be expelled by all schools owned by Betsy DeVos.
10.  Holocaust that destroys all human life will at least cause cancellation of The Orville and New York Giants football season.

Older Posts
Newer Posts