Dick Cheney Teaches Logic

From the Associated Press:

Vice President Dick Cheney asserted on Thursday that a finding by the chief U.S. weapons inspector in Iraq that Saddam Hussein's government produced no weapons of mass destruction after 1991 justifies rather than undermines President Bush's decision to go to war.

Now this statement may seem paradoxical at first, but it's really quite simple, you see. Going to war to removing Saddam from power was justified because Saddam posed a threat. Saddam posed a threat because he might use weapons of mass destruction or give them to terrorists who would use them on the United States. However, Saddam had no weapons of mass destruction and lacked the ability to produce them because of the 1991 Gulf War and the sanctions that followed it.

Therefore the sanctions didn't work. They didn't work because they prevented Saddam from obtaining the weapons of mass destruction that would have justified our removing him from power.

Still don't get it? Well, here's another way to look at it. As long as Saddam was debilitated by his loss in the 1991 Gulf War and boxed in by the sanctions, he couldn't develop the weapons of mass destruction that would make him the sort of threat that would justify the United States attacking him. In other words, the sanctions were preventing the United States from justifying the war against Iraq. Therefore the sanctions didn't work.

Now I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that this argument assumes that the Bush Administration was determined to attack Iraq no matter what and that it was just looking for a convenient justification on which to hang the war. But that's really a very cynical assumption on your part. When you understand the logic of Cheney's argument you will understand why you are totally wrong and should be ashamed of yourself for even entertaining such a possibility. You see, if Saddam hadn't been boxed in by the sanctions, he would be a threat, and then the United States would be justified in attacking him in order to prevent the proliferation of weapons of mass destruction. If it hadn't been for those sanctions, the United States would have had a perfectly good justification for attacking Iraq that would have allowed the Administration to start a war in perfect good faith. So you see, if the Bush Administration's invasion of Iraq is an unjustified, arrogant and ill-advised decision it's really all due to those pesky sanctions, which prevented the Administration's decision from being justified, prudent, and sound.

Do you get it now? I knew you would.